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August 18 Many thoughts, resolution, hopes, regrets and so onIt has been a while since I last added an entry onto my spaces (maybe more than a year? haha). Since I am suffereing from a very severe abominal cramp at this moment , which prevents me from doing anything other than to sit still in front of my computer (not even sleep), I thought I could summarize what's happening to me so far ...
Just finished my second float, it was an entirely different experience from my first one. The adminstration was different, the friends made are different, the tasks I did were different, and many more .. This year we did not manage to secure any awards, most of them went to KR, and the remnants were distributed along Temasek and Shears. (I shall not comment on this :X). Although this is certainly regretable (I thought from a distance our float was wonderful), but sadness did not overwhelm me as KR float was intricate in terms of details, exquisite in term of workmanship (Albeit from far I strongly felt that both our floats are sight to behold huh ... pardon me). In addition, I got to interact and know some interesting ppl and we did have some very enjoyable moment together in the midst of the arduous and excruciating production phase. (Yep this is about the only time when I did not sleep for more than 5 hours for 2 weeks, worse than NS training ..).
As now everything has come to an end, I will really miss those thing, although it is really about time to move on ... I must say thank everyone who had made my past 1 months a very special event in the history of my life : )
Of course, I must apologize for not being able to help out with the post-float clean-up, I've been sick for almost the whole week including now .....
Before float I was busy with special term and reservice (yep is it the 3rd one ? ahh...). The special term didn't go too well, it was during the special term that I spent 2 weeks at home for the first time in 1 year? haha. The reservice was as dull and uninteresting as expected, but all the reunion made it bearable. (Except for the few inconsiderable, idiotic indians who smoke and shouted right to 3 am, causing most of the platoon to lose much sleep..)
Now that the new semester has started (which happened to be my last year haha), everything is not going in the right direction. Huh, firstly on Monday I had my first KTV session in many months, huh with a different bunch of ppl and it was a totally different experience (Huh, it was to celebrate Huiying 21's birthday). Anyway, after that KTV I found another person who can sing without a mic just like Poh Zhong Hong, that will be Panda Kin .... huh if both of them were to be singing the same sesson I guess no mic is needed ...
Tuesday: Finally met with my Honours project supervisor, who happened to be my UROPS supervisor, yep the project was a continuation of my UROPS except that we are interested in elucidating the mechanisms instead of measuring the catalytic activity.. tough job hopefully I can survive...
Wednesday: First day when I fell sick .. thought it was a flu and would go away soon but I was wrong ...
Thursday: Went to YIH to consult a doctor, he gave me a combination of panadol, chlorophenylamine and Pseudo ... HCl typical drugs for cold .. and apparently costed me 2 lectures due to the incredible drowsiness it effected on me...
Friday: No more fever, but still down with running nose and cough, still feeling weak ... lucky there is no lecture today...
Saturday: Still down with the same symptoms, but manage to go home after all. Guess it was a long time since I last played the piano in my house, getting a little bit out of tune .. the middle C is a bit flat .... but nevertheless I still enjoy playing it and improvised endlessly for hours on it ... I tried to sing a few songs by accompanying myself .. I realised that Jay Chou, "THe longest movie" is a very nice song, with complex harmony and a nice melody, though I didn't manage to hit the C# which happened to be the highest note in the song (need more practice). When back to hall after 9pm ...
Sunday: Feeling weak, and at 7pm I suddenly fell a sharp pain in my adominal which lasted until now and still have not subside ...
And now finally for some resolutions
Hope to get what I aimed for when I first came to NUS at the end of the next semester (which is my final one)
Hope to finish the perfect pitch training...
Hope that my friends will be well and leading cheerful and fulfilling life, same for my family
Hope to get well Ha Ha finally
THE END. January 13 School is starting again (Summary of holiday)Today is the last day of the holiday haha , and this is a summary of what I have done during the holiday.
1. Completed 2nd ICT:
Terrible experience ... over garang CO , super WaYang OC and incredible lousy Ration delivery (during to starve us to death and still want us to train hard). The only good things about ICT are chances to meet up with some long lost platoon mate and well spend most of our free times playing cards and talking "crap". And the next ICT will be at June cool (eating my holiday again..)
2. Wrote 2 new songs:
Ah.. no motivation to completely arranged them haha , still trying to write the lyrics...
3. Sing KTV
With Ang KK, ZY Chan, Eddy Wee and POH .. very fun sessions , sang for 5 hours almost lost my voice...
4. Celebrate Angus's Birthday
Bought him a cake, played MJ and finally he some $$ but too bad the $$ ended up in my stomach in the end (it was mine to begin with).
5. Officially the president of SLB !!
Since Mr Wu is not longer qualified to be the president , I automtically suceed him LOL
6. Played tons of DOTA
Ha guess won't be playing when school starts ...
7. Bought GeFore 8800 GT
Costs me 400 bucks .. and the only game I get to test its power is Hellgate London which unfortunately is a sucky game (Waste my money) and great I found out that direct X 10 is only for windows vista ... hence i dun even get to see the legendary directX 10 graphic with my 8800.
8. Screwed up my CM3221
Freak , that's the worst chemistry module grade I got .. and now I'm taking its upgraded module CM4224 or 2 cant remember .. got to work harder...
9. Celebrated my brother's birthday
Well it was the first party that was ever organized in my house .. well and it was the first time that my parents ever received any gifts from 3 of us lol.
10. My brother played FANTASIE IMPROMPTU in C#
Great that is one of the 2 songs I ever wanted to play on piano eventually but no motivation to practise it yet plus I dun want to spolit my casio electronic piano. November 12 Update finallyWell, it has been a long been since I last blogged anything..
Have been living in hall for about a year.. haha got to know a lot of new ppl.
Anyway it is exam period Ahh.. and I am too slack for my own good.. Got to work harder..
ICT will come straight after exam .. it's going to eat away half of my holiday ... anyway will be having hand ball training and chinese drama during the holiday so it's not much of a holiday...
And also will be doing my research project during the holiday also ha ha .. that's the "best" module .. 8 credit but 20 hours of lab a week .... well at least I got to experience what research is really like ...
Have been writing a new song .. got the chorus and tons of candidate for the verse .. but only 2 lines of lyrics haha .. huh guess will finish it after the ICT ...
Lastly, Good Luck for the Up Coming Exam for all students' friends of mine January 30 There is no black and white, only different shades of greyHellooo... just some thoughts...
The more I study the more I feel that most of reality isn't about black and white, it's about how much black and how much white you have the mixture - in another word, it's just different hues of grey... Many things I learnt in school support this, for instance the ideal gas law which we learnt is never true, statistics tests never give u anything absolute it only gives u the probability, orbitals do not hold electrons all the times it's only 90% that they reside in it, electrons can have both wave properties and particles properties - so are they wave or particles or nope? And finally to make thing worse we have the Heisenberg's uncertainty principle ... which essentially says that there are a pair of observables such as momentum and position which you can know the exact value of both simultaneously ... in addition we have the Godel's incompleteness theorem which says that there exists things that cannot be proven to be true or false .. oh man ...
That's just examples from science ... in our society such uncertainty also exists, and guess most of us has seen some of them. Backstabbing, exploitation and so on...
Guess I am facing an identity crisis haha, I am uncertain about what to believe in. I used to believe that saving people is meaningful but on second thought if we do not have the rights to take away somebody's life why do we have the rights to save people?
Haiz ... Guess that's all for the time being, hope in the future I am able to find my belief ...
To angus( if u r reading haha): Stop mugging for your GPA of 5!!! Take it easy , just be yourself(opps). Ha anyway really sometimes I feel like it doesn't matter if you can't get that perfect score what matters is you have tried, at least you can have a clear conscience.. guess that applies to other aspects of life beside studying....
To BX: LOL thx for not making me lose a hundred dollars in 2 sessions of MJ.
To ZY: It's high time to introduce some of your "mei mei" to your friends... and dun drink 10 cups of free milo in a row...
To the rest of my friends : Good luck and Have fun in life for there is only one of it ( at least in the near future
Lastly ... it's time to sleep still got 7hrs of lab waiting for me tomorrow and tons of tutorials!!!!
December 11 Yep another HolidayYep Exam is finally over, and here is a short one month break ... Hopefully this break will be a meaningful one November 14 Yep I am useless indeedAfter the still on-going fiasco with my neighbour on top which has turned from bad to worse, resulting in being "forced out" of my house ...I come to realise how limited I can do ... Yep with the imminent examination, I can't do anything to "teach" those inconsiderate ppl on top how to live more graciously in a HDB flat. Yep complaints don't help much either , HDB is powerless, MP advocates persuasion which obviously had quite an adverse effect as 1 day after they visited those ppl on top, I was bombarded with incessant noises from noon till well who knows when it's still on going although it's 11.30pm now. Haiz.. no time to do anything to them, as the exams are coming ...
Lesson learnt - dun take peace and quietness for granted if you r living in a HDB and dun happened to live in the top floor. Be grateful to your neighbours( on top , at the sides ) for giving you peace, as they certainly have the potential to cause destructive nuisance.
Yep last blog before exams, cause I will be seeking refuge in a place away from my house for the time being ... A million thanks to my uncle who offered a place for me to have peace for this period. I pray hard really hard that the school will offer me accomodation for next sem.
That's all, good luck to all friends who are going to have or having their exam.
I will be back to let them learn to be a considerate neighbour the hard way( of course legally)
October 29 The days ahead... Ah enough of neighbours on top ... the limits of my patience had already been reached and maybe see them in court soon. Cast that aside first. Yes it's the "MUGGING" season again, the pressures coming everywhere especially on top, well cast that aside. The prospect of this sem looks bleak.. ah just try not to suffer an irrevocable damage to my CAP ... anyway guess the advent of November is giving everybody who's in this academic life Pascal and Torr and Atm and Nm of pressure .... well after this tormenting November will be a month long worth of respite hopefully for everybody.
Well, tons of thought came to one over this October, first of course it's how inconsiderate people can get ... follow by misunderstanding is indeed the root of conflicts ... and sometimes understanding can be a root of conflict(Yes Neighbour again, Now I do understand). More, friends that understand you are hard to come by, so don't be too fastitdious ... treasure those who treat you like a friend.
Yep it's raining in my life now, who knows when it will stop ... well it's raining in other people's life also, are we all yearning to see the rainbow after the rain? Can we hold on till that moment come? Are you all alone in this rain? Have you manage to find an umbrella which can afford you some relief? Or you just dun bother to look for an umbrella and believe that the rain will stop soon? Or do you think that the umbrella is unable to provide you with sufficient shelther and you are looking for a rain coat instead?
Will the person in this rain ever realise that begin fussy and over optimistic will only culminate in him suffering? Will the person understand that the umbrella wants to protect him from this rain, but he must pick up the umbrella and use it?
Yep who understands?
September 27 Yes it's a lot Guess problems are an intrinsic part of our life, problems manifest in various forms but how to define what's a problem? Definition is surely redundant cos' when u encountered a problem u will know that it is.. One thing I realised recently is that tough problem arises sponataneously, and some problems might be inherently simple in nature but the a complete rectification is virtually impossible to achieve. When in such situation should the course of action be to resort to drastic measure or just settle for a compromise? Maybe a utilitarianism approach should be the best but what benefits most ppl might not benefit yourself most so the contradiction occurs and together with ethical and moral issues intertwined and here we have a seemingly insurmountable conundrum. Yep enough of philosophical talks, just want to wish all my friends who are having tough problems in their life all the best and may you see the vestige of light that remains in your world which is engulf by darkness and may it leads you to a solution.
There are things that are integrated into our life and we might not realise its importance until we realize that it's not inseparable from our life. Well, this is also one thing that i seemed to be enlightened recently. Realising that i won't be able to stay in my little comfort (at least until recently) room forever, I have a strange feeling that never occurs to me, huh still wondering what the feeling is. I guess it's a sense of unable to bear with something that is with u for so long a time, a kinda of attachment to inanimate objects. But that's life u have to move forward as directed by time, and some things have to be given up albeit u do not want to. Guess they can only remain in your memory as a chapter in the history of your life, anyway hope that we r able to treasure all the things that are with you but could not or never asked for your acknowledgement. August 10 ContradictionThere can be no more real love, than there can be no less contrived feeling.
For in you I found both joy and agony. For in me I feel both confidence and trepidation. For in life, is it a contradiction? The soul who seeks to find the truth in it, the mind which seeks to justify the acts in it and the self which seeks to see itself . Time may provide an answer, but it's still premature to tell. July 19 Is what you expressed what you want to convey? Communication is a very wonderful thing, it allows us to better understand one another. However, I found that a lot of times, people don't really say or do what they really what to, due to the constraint or limitation of external factors. As a result, conflict may arise due to misunderstanding. Of course, they are a lot of straight-forward people who are not afraid to express what they believe or they want. But most of the time, they end up offending the other party, anyway it doesn't really matter if they don't care about it.
One of the interesting parts in communication is to analyze and interpret whether somebody really means they said or did. Of course, it's a very difficult task, which require experience, concentration and skills. Are you the type of person whose expression and intention coincide? or are you one that will compromise your intention through your expression?
Ah.. human communication is such a complex function ... there are times when I don't know whether what a person really saying or doing what he or she wants or it's just perfunctory. Also there are times when I said something I don't want to but hoping that through my non-verbal ques I can get the person to understand. But most of the time I mean what I say, if I don't say means I don't want...
As for now I can continue my observation on communication and hope that I can be a better listener and interpreter. July 13 Things I enjoyed doing nowadayHuh .. let's see
1. Playing mahjong with Angus, BX , SC or Eng huat, haha not so much of winning or losing but because it's fun playing with them. Ha Ha all the stuns that Angus can come out with, all the "swearing", "cursing" and "suaning" adds color to the game.
2. Playing my piano. My all-time favorite. Nowaday, it has become my free KTV session. Ah.. and my nocturne op9 no2 still has 1 page left ... dunno when I'm going to finish it.
3. WoW. A different experience, got the priviledge to enjoy it cos' of school holiday. I got to live in a fantasy world in which I can do all the things that will only happen in fictional world and of course poh has added a lot of fun to my playing and got to know a lot of poh's friends haha, but sadly school's starting so maybe good bye to WoW
4.Reading. Yep enjoyable if yo have a good book to read such as the one I'm reading on "On Beauty" which is very provoking, makes me think and think...
5. Watching movie. If there is a good movie to watch and a good company it'll certainly will enjoyable. I'm lucky ot have both of them in this holiday haha.
6. Writing song. 2 incomplete pieces and I ran out of inspiration haha maybe I'll just combine them.
7. KTV. with PnR Platoon guys: there will be a lot of laugther cos' of our "star" singer Chan Zhiyong who never fails to shatter any glasses you can name. Angus who is improving on his FIR haha but ... Sin Chuen who can sing like Andy Lau Wooh.. BX who still hasn't sing his main theme yet. Poh with his loud and high voices and more more more ...
with 4/6 folk: more like a class gathering huh haha and of course we got great singers ( I dun mean me. I suck anyway haha )
That's all hope I can add more of them to this list : ) June 20 CaptureNow I know why is it good to have a video recorder , camera built into your phone. It means that you can capture lot of memories convienently, this is especially evident in my 1st ICT(in camp training). lots of fun, laughter capture haha. 3 cheers to Technology or 3 cheers to my nokia 6280 with its Klingston MiniSD card May 01 Not proportional?There is something which if you put in llinear amount of effort you might get an exponential return, but sometimes when you put in exponential amount of effort you might get a linear return or worse zero return ... September 10 A break that doesn't seem like oneFinally, a break is coming .. but is it to rest or is to break even with the amount of work that appears to keep on coming in ... To everybody who feels the same , may you are able to find solace in some form, all the best.
"You are not alone" It's a very nice song from final fantasy IV , I'll learn to play it this break ... August 16 To each his/her own I see something which I couldn't see clearly in the past. Maybe it's cos' that I was too inflexible, obstinate or something else.
Everybody should have his or her dreams. Althought, I'll be tough to realise it, but cos' we know that it's what we really want , we have the impetus to complete it. I think I'm beginning to see the dreams of m friends. I was clouded by my own ignorance in the past, thought I am still quite unaware of a lot of things around me. I am able to at least realise some parts of reality. It maybe not possible to have the same dreams as your friends, but you can always do your best to help them in making it come true. It's the least a friend can do for one another. I wish I can do this for everyone whom I know. However, I must apologise for not begin able to share the same goals in life as you all. July 14 Nostalgia Things come and go. Sometimes we don't realise it until that day when it disappears from our life. When that times arise, we'll be left with only a wistful memory of it.
However, sometimes we do realise that we've something very dear to us,but the fact that it's still with you isn't because of a realistic bond. It's because of a semblance of common belief that binded two distant hearts together.When one of them realised that the belief is virtual, the gossamer bond that exist will be broken. Maybe I do see it coming, but I still hope that it'll no be true. However, one cannot lives in his dreamland forever, therefore ,painful it will be, you'll 've to leave where or what that doesn't really exist in your life.
The end of a beginning is the beginning of the end, however is the opposite true?May we fly through the clouds of illusion and find a true skies where we belong,where there is freedom ...
May 19 Struck again why?Guess when U've too many things in mind U wish to accomplish, u'll tend to get nope of them done ... that's what I'm experiencing now ... at least I got one of them done, but 've to be more focused, don't vacillate, remain firm ahh so hard ... but guess there's no choice or else u'll never complete anything : ) April 26 What's wrong??Recently, I've been wondering whether is it that the people surrounding me are changing or is it that I didn't really know them. How far are people willing to go in pursuit of their dreams? Is it that difficult to tell the truth? Must really earning a prodigious amount of money really the dreams of most people? It's incontrovertible that we cannot survive without money, but are we satisfied when we've enough for our needs or do we covet for more?Maybe I'm just being narrow-minded.I've to admit that I'm not satisfied when I meet a particular requirement set by myself, I'll with doubt strive to reach the next level. Do U consider this as being greedy?Maybe cos' I cannot reconcile myself with the fact that there are peoples who are willing to his unscrupulous means to earn money ... It could be cos' that I couldn't agree that I label those means "unscrupulous". I really wish I've an answer ... to all the disappointment that I had. If it's really happened to be just a lunch invitation by my friend, how nice .. haha. If it's really just a simple opportunity to let your friend know more about something by attending a talk, how nice also .. I'm sorry that I couldn't help, really maybe the only way of helping is not to impede them. |
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